Thursday, October 15, 2009

Transylvanian Transfusion

Bruce Hill and his new wife Sheila were holidaying in Europe, near Transylvania. They were driving a rental car along a deserted road. It was late and raining heavily. Bruce could barely see the road in front of the car. Suddenly the car skids out of control. Bruce attempts to regain control if the car but to no avail. The car swerves and smashes into a tree.

Moments later, Bruce shakes his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looks over at the passenger seat and sees his wife unconscious, with her head bleeding. Despite the rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bruce knows he has to get her medical assistance.

Bruce carefully picks his wife up and begins trudging down the road. After a short while, he sees a light. He heads towards the light, which is coming from a large, old house. He approaches the door and knocks.

A minute passes. A small, hunched man opens the door. Bruce immediately blurts, "Hello, my name is Bruce Hill, and this is my wife Sheila. We've been in a terrible accident, and my wife has been seriously hurt. Can I please use your phone?"

"I'm sorry," replied the hunchback, "but we don't have a phone. My master is a doctor; come in and I will get him."

Bruce brings his wife in. An older man comes down the stairs. "I'm afraid my assistant may have misled you. I am not a medical doctor; I am a scientist. However, it is many miles to the nearest clinic, and I have had a basic medical training. I will see what I can do. Igor, bring them down to the laboratory."

With that, Igor picks up Sheila and carries her downstairs, with Bruce following closely. Igor places Sheila on a table in the lab. Bruce collapses from exhaustion and his own injuries, so Igor places Bruce on an adjoining table.

After a brief examination, Igor's master looks worried. "Things are serious, Igor. Prepare a transfusion." Igor and his master work feverishly, but to no avail. Bruce and Sheila Hill are no more.

The Hills' deaths upset Igor's master greatly. Wearily, he climbs the steps to his conservatory, which houses his grand piano. For it is here that he has always found solace. He begins to play, and a stirring, almost haunting melody fills the house.

Meanwhile, Igor is still in the lab tidying up. His eyes catch movement, and he notices the fingers on Sheila's hand twitch, keeping time to the haunting piano music. Stunned, he watches as Bruce's arm begins to rise, marking the beat. He is further amazed as Sheila and Bruce both sit up straight.

Unable to contain himself, he dashes up the stairs to the conservatory. He bursts in and shouts to his master:

"Master, Master! The Hills are alive with the sound of music!"

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